my dating identity

So, I am just re-entering the dating scene after getting out of a serious, long term relationship.  I was wondering what men will think of me, who they think I am.  I also wonder what a man will think if he walks into my room, based on what's in there.  Here's a general list of what's in my room and hanging on the walls: lots of art, a Ferrari flag, several crosses & rosaries, Colts gear, tons of books (art books, religion books, sorority books, and novels of all varieties), clothes/shoes that evidence my retail addiction, and more. I've realized that I am a walking series of contradictions.  Here goes:

I'm Catholic with a drawer of sex toys.
I'm an art fanatic and a football fanatic.
I love fashion, being girly, and dressing up and I love camping, hiking, and the whole not showering thing.
I'm a former sorority president and I'm fiercely independent.

I wonder what kind of man would be attracted to a girl like me, who doesn't seem to make sense, but I do.  These seem like contradictions, but they all work for me.  And if a guy weren't just totally confused at first, and would give me a chance to explain them, maybe I'd have a chance with him.

My fellow bloggers and I decided to try to explain our "type" to each other.  I gave it a shot.  But when I look at the walking contradiction that I am, I wonder what kind of person is really right for me.  I'm going on a date tomorrow with a guy who doesn't fall into that "type" in several ways (esp. physically), but I'm excited for it and open for the chance.  Having not had a real date with someone I'm actually interested in in a long time, I guess I don't really know.

This has been a long, rambling post, so what's the lesson here?  I think it's that age-old lesson of not losing yourself.  I, unfortunately, lost a lot of myself in my LTR and am in the process of regaining that now that I'm single and dating again.  So now I have to ensure that I know my identity and am certain of it.  And I need to be comfortable in it, be sure that, on a date, I'm totally honest and upfront.  I would expect nothing less from a boy I'm out with too.


And, a final, unrelated lesson.  From the film "America the Beautiful".  The filmmaker interviewed Eve Ensler, author of The Vagina Monologues.  In her discussion about cosmetic surgeries to improve the appearance of a woman's genitalia.  She thought it was ridiculous that women are getting surgery to make their labia even, when FGM is what we're fighting in Africa.  In light of women getting what they call "Vaginal Rejuvenation",  she said "Too lose? Get a bigger dick!"     I couldn't agree more.